【改前语】在作文中学用修辞,使语言优美,表达生动本无可厚非,还应提倡鼓励,然而不但表意不明,文句不通,还一味地在雕琢词句上显能耐,最后弄巧成拙、以词害义,那就走入了滥用修辞的误区。下面的这篇习作,语病甚多,修辞失当,应该认真修改,希望通过评改此文,能使同学们并明确一个作文的基本原则——要先求文句通顺,再求语言优美。【原文】拾忆,也是一种享受时光仿佛一趟匀速行驶的列车,车轨处厚重的“隆隆”声因经过历史的沉淀而别有 【Phrasebook】 In the composition of secondary rhetoric, the language is beautiful, vivid is understandable, but also to encourage encouragement, but not only the unknown, the sentence is unreasonable, but also blindly in the carved words and expressions were able to end up self-defeating, the word harm , Then went into the misuse of rhetorical misunderstanding. The following essay, rhetoric, rhetoric misconduct, should be conscientiously amended, hope that by revising this article, students can make clear the basic principles of an essay - first seek the passage of the sentence, and then seek the beautiful language. [Original] Memory, is also a kind of enjoyment of time like a trip uniform driving train at the heavy “rumble ” sound because of historical precipitation and do not have