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Kjerstin Gruys, a 29-year-old PhD student in sociology, has mastered the art of avoiding her own reflection. For months, her daily schedule began with the typical teeth brushing, but a curtain covered the bathroom mirror. She inserted her contact lenses and applied her makeup by touch, not sight. Driving to work required glances in the rear- and side-view mirrors, but Gruys avoided peeking at her own image.
It was part of a unique experiment that Gruys hopes will help boost her own self-esteem and inspire others to stop focusing on external perfection. In her blog “Mirror, Mirror Off the Wall”, she documents her yearlong effort to live mirror-free.
The project had its roots in Gruys’ struggles with body image and her experience overcoming an eating disorder. In high school, Gruys said, she had insecurities about her appearance and suffered from anorexia.
Gruys launched her no-mirrors project in March 2010, while planning her wedding to then fiance Michael Ackermann. Wedding dress shopping was not the pleasure-filled experience that she had expected. But instead, Gruys says dress shopping was a source of stress.
“I saw myself in the mirror and was being critical,”she says. “I thought, well, maybe I should lose a little weight before the wedding, always a bad thing to focus on when you have a history of an eating disorder.”
Then Gruys read a passage in the book Birth of Venus, describing an order of nuns in Renaissance Italy who had severe restrictions against vanity. “They didn’t have mirrors in their lives. They were forbidden to look at each other when undressing. They were actually forbidden to look at themselves while they undressed.”
For the first time in her life, Gruys said she was tempted to follow suit.
In the beginning of her mirror-free lifestyle, Gruys admits there were a few maintenance mishaps.
“The first month of the project ... when I was walking out the door ... it was maybe a 50-50 shot that I had mascara on my nose.”
But quickly, she learned to adapt. Gruys says she trained herself to avoid eye contact with her own image in windows and other reflective surfaces, trusted friends to tell her what looks good instead of relying on the mirror in dressing rooms. And she put complete faith in her hair stylist.
To the surprise of many, Kjerstin says the wedding day was actually one of the easiest days to navigate mirror-free.
“I’m getting my focus back to thinking about the real meaning of the day, which isn’t how I look but marrying the love of my life,” she said.
It was part of a unique experiment that Gruys hopes will help boost her own self-esteem and inspire others to stop focusing on external perfection. In her blog “Mirror, Mirror Off the Wall”, she documents her yearlong effort to live mirror-free.
The project had its roots in Gruys’ struggles with body image and her experience overcoming an eating disorder. In high school, Gruys said, she had insecurities about her appearance and suffered from anorexia.
Gruys launched her no-mirrors project in March 2010, while planning her wedding to then fiance Michael Ackermann. Wedding dress shopping was not the pleasure-filled experience that she had expected. But instead, Gruys says dress shopping was a source of stress.
“I saw myself in the mirror and was being critical,”she says. “I thought, well, maybe I should lose a little weight before the wedding, always a bad thing to focus on when you have a history of an eating disorder.”
Then Gruys read a passage in the book Birth of Venus, describing an order of nuns in Renaissance Italy who had severe restrictions against vanity. “They didn’t have mirrors in their lives. They were forbidden to look at each other when undressing. They were actually forbidden to look at themselves while they undressed.”
For the first time in her life, Gruys said she was tempted to follow suit.
In the beginning of her mirror-free lifestyle, Gruys admits there were a few maintenance mishaps.
“The first month of the project ... when I was walking out the door ... it was maybe a 50-50 shot that I had mascara on my nose.”
But quickly, she learned to adapt. Gruys says she trained herself to avoid eye contact with her own image in windows and other reflective surfaces, trusted friends to tell her what looks good instead of relying on the mirror in dressing rooms. And she put complete faith in her hair stylist.
To the surprise of many, Kjerstin says the wedding day was actually one of the easiest days to navigate mirror-free.
“I’m getting my focus back to thinking about the real meaning of the day, which isn’t how I look but marrying the love of my life,” she said.