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导读：爱，并不是要改变对方。因为没有人理所当然应该牺牲自己的兴趣和习惯来迎合你。无论是朋友，抑或是亲人，我们都应当学会让步和妥协。
“I’ve discovered that you can’t change people. They can change themselves.”—Jim Rohn
We all want to be loved and accepted， just as we are. We want people to honor our interests， value our needs， and respect our choices in life. So why， then， do we expect other people to sacrifice theirs for us？ Why do we hope people will change their goals， habits， and values to better match with ours when they haven’t given us any indication they’d be happier for doing it？
Sometimes we think we know what’s best for others， but if we’re honest with ourselves， we’ll likely realize we want people to change when we simply don’t feel satisfied being in a relationship with them as they are. I’m not talking about people who are dangerous to themselves and others. I’m talking about the partner who isn’t as open-minded as you. Or the friend who doesn’t value fitness like you. Or the husband who isn’t as social as you. Or the wife who doesn’t take risks like you.
Relationships are all about compromise， and there’s no such thing as a perfect match. But we owe it to ourselves to recognize what’s non-negotiable in relationships so we don’t end up unwillingly sacrificing our needs while secretly hoping the people we’re with will make it worth our while. For the people we want to change， there are others out there who’d accept and even value them， just as they are. We can appreciate them for all their unique interests and preferences. Or we can set them free and create the possibility of finding better matches. We deserve to be happy in our relationships. That starts with choosing to be with people we’d never want to change.
Vocabulary
sacrifice v. 牺牲
indication n. 迹象
compromise n. 妥协，让步
non-negotiable adj. 无商量余地的
（Have you learned how to deal with the above problems in a relationship？）
“I’ve discovered that you can’t change people. They can change themselves.”—Jim Rohn
We all want to be loved and accepted， just as we are. We want people to honor our interests， value our needs， and respect our choices in life. So why， then， do we expect other people to sacrifice theirs for us？ Why do we hope people will change their goals， habits， and values to better match with ours when they haven’t given us any indication they’d be happier for doing it？
Sometimes we think we know what’s best for others， but if we’re honest with ourselves， we’ll likely realize we want people to change when we simply don’t feel satisfied being in a relationship with them as they are. I’m not talking about people who are dangerous to themselves and others. I’m talking about the partner who isn’t as open-minded as you. Or the friend who doesn’t value fitness like you. Or the husband who isn’t as social as you. Or the wife who doesn’t take risks like you.
Relationships are all about compromise， and there’s no such thing as a perfect match. But we owe it to ourselves to recognize what’s non-negotiable in relationships so we don’t end up unwillingly sacrificing our needs while secretly hoping the people we’re with will make it worth our while. For the people we want to change， there are others out there who’d accept and even value them， just as they are. We can appreciate them for all their unique interests and preferences. Or we can set them free and create the possibility of finding better matches. We deserve to be happy in our relationships. That starts with choosing to be with people we’d never want to change.
Vocabulary
sacrifice v. 牺牲
indication n. 迹象
compromise n. 妥协，让步
non-negotiable adj. 无商量余地的
（Have you learned how to deal with the above problems in a relationship？）