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什么叫“故意忽略法”呢?平时,孩子有许多正当行为:玩,看画书,写作业,甚至画了一幅画,捏了一个橡皮人,表现出孩子的想象力。但是我们常常观而不见。也就是说,我们常常忽略大量的积极行为,而当孩子哭闹,甚至躺在地上打滚的时候,我们却常常去打断他们,或哄,或打,或骂,我们这些行为就是所谓“消极鼓励”。我们很多人有这种体会,孩子学骂人比学好话快。请看:妈妈去幼儿园接儿子。妈妈:“穿上大衣!”儿子:“我不穿!”妈妈:“穿上,我们回家!”儿子:“猪脸!”妈妈:“不许这样说!”(吃惊地)儿子:“猪脸、猪脸。”(狡猾地)妈妈:“赶快闭嘴!”(大声地)儿子:“猪脸!”(小声地)妈妈:“你怎么还说!”儿子:“猪脸——,猪——” (悄声地)妈妈:“你再说,我买东西不带你去!”儿子:“猪——,猪——!”(嘟哝着)妈妈:“我不要你了!”……
At ordinary times, children have many proper behaviors: playing, reading picture books, writing homework and even drawing a picture, squeezing an eraser and showing the child’s imagination. But we often turn a blind eye. In other words, we often neglect a large number of positive behaviors. When children cry or even roost on the ground, we often interrupt or coax or fight or scold us. These behaviors are what we call “ Negative encouragement. ” Many of us have this kind of experience. Children learn to scold people faster than students. See: Mom went to kindergarten to pick up his son. Mom: “Wearing a coat! ” Son: “I do not wear! ” Mom: “Put on, we go home! ” Son: “Pig face! ” Mom: “Do not say that! (Surprisingly) son: ”Pig face, pig face.“ (Cunningly) Mom: ”Shut up! “ (Loudly) Son: ”Hog!“ Son: ”pig face -, pig - “ (whispered) mom: ”You say again, I buy things do not take you to go!“ ”Son: “ pig -, pig -! ”(Muttering) Mom: “ I do not want you! ”...