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1. One Side of the Case
A judge asked our group of potential jurors(陪审员) whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand.
“I can’t hear out of my left ear,” the man told the judge.
“Can you hear out of your right ear?” the judge asked. The man nodded his head.
“You’ll be allowed to serve on the jury,” the judge declared. “We only listen to one side of the case at a time.”
2. Early Shopper
It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. “What are you charged with?”he asked.
“Doing my Christmas shopping early,” replied the defendant.
“That’s no offense,” replied the judge, “How early were you doing this shopping?”
“Before the store opened,” countered the prisoner.
3. I Didn’t Know That I Was So Far Back Already!
A big battle was going on during the First World War. Guns were firing, and shells and bullets were flying about everywhere. After an hour of this, one of the soldier decided that the fighting was getting too dangerous for him, so he left the front line and began to go away from the battle. After he had walked for an hour, he saw an officer coming towards him. The officer stopped him and said, “Where are you going?”
“I’m trying to get as far away as possible from the battle that’s going on behind us, sir.” the soldier answered.
“Do you know who I am?” the officer said to him angrily. “I’m your commanding officer.”
The soldier was very surprised when he heard this and said, “My God, I didn’t know that I was so far back already!”
4. A Trip to Disney
On a trip to Disney World in Florida, my husband and I and our two children devoted ourselves wholeheartedly to the wonders of this attraction. After three exhausting days, we headed for home.
As we drove away, our son waved and said, “Good-bye, Mickey.”
Our daughter waved and said, “Good-bye, Minnie.”
My husband waved, rather weakly, and said, “Good-bye, Money.”
A judge asked our group of potential jurors(陪审员) whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand.
“I can’t hear out of my left ear,” the man told the judge.
“Can you hear out of your right ear?” the judge asked. The man nodded his head.
“You’ll be allowed to serve on the jury,” the judge declared. “We only listen to one side of the case at a time.”
2. Early Shopper
It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. “What are you charged with?”he asked.
“Doing my Christmas shopping early,” replied the defendant.
“That’s no offense,” replied the judge, “How early were you doing this shopping?”
“Before the store opened,” countered the prisoner.
3. I Didn’t Know That I Was So Far Back Already!
A big battle was going on during the First World War. Guns were firing, and shells and bullets were flying about everywhere. After an hour of this, one of the soldier decided that the fighting was getting too dangerous for him, so he left the front line and began to go away from the battle. After he had walked for an hour, he saw an officer coming towards him. The officer stopped him and said, “Where are you going?”
“I’m trying to get as far away as possible from the battle that’s going on behind us, sir.” the soldier answered.
“Do you know who I am?” the officer said to him angrily. “I’m your commanding officer.”
The soldier was very surprised when he heard this and said, “My God, I didn’t know that I was so far back already!”
4. A Trip to Disney
On a trip to Disney World in Florida, my husband and I and our two children devoted ourselves wholeheartedly to the wonders of this attraction. After three exhausting days, we headed for home.
As we drove away, our son waved and said, “Good-bye, Mickey.”
Our daughter waved and said, “Good-bye, Minnie.”
My husband waved, rather weakly, and said, “Good-bye, Money.”