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President Walsh， trustees， faculty， friends， noble parents...and dear class of 1996，2 I am so proud of you. Thank you for asking me to speak to you today.
I remember my own graduation from Wellesley very， very well. The speaker was Santha Rama Rau3 who was a woman writer.
I want to tell you a little bit about my class， the class of 1962. When we came to Wellesley in the fall of 1958， there was an article in the Harvard Crimson4 about the women’s colleges. We were girls then， by the way， Wellesley girls. How long ago was it？ It was so long ago that while I was here， Wellesley actually threw six young women out for lesbianism5. It was so long ago that we had curfews6. It was so long ago that if you had a boy in your room， you had to leave the door open six inches， and if you closed the door you had to put a sock on the doorknob7. In my class， I don’t know， maybe 375 young women， there were six Asians and five Blacks. There was a strict quota8 on the number of Jews.
My class went to college in the era when you got a master’s degree in teaching because it was “something to fall back on” in the worst case scenario，9 the worst case scenario being that no one married you and you actually had to go to work. As one classmate said at our reunion， “Our education was a dress rehearsal for a life we never led.”10 Isn’t that the saddest line？ We weren’t meant to have futures， we were meant to marry men. We weren’t meant to have politics， or careers that mattered， or opinions， or lives； we were meant to marry men. If you wanted to be an architect， you married an architect.
My mother was a career woman， and all of us， her four daughters， grew up understanding that the question， “What do you want to be when you grow up？” was as valid11 for girls as for boys.
Why am I telling you this？ Things have changed. Things are different for you than they were for us. Just the fact that you chose to come to a single-sex college makes you smarter than we were—we came because it’s what you did in those days—and the college you are graduating from is a very different place. All sorts of things caused Wellesley to change， it did change， and today it’s a place that understands its obligations to women in today’s world. The women’s movement has made a huge difference， too， particularly for young women like you. There are women doctors and women lawyers. There are anchorwomen， although most of them are blonde.12 But at the same time， the pay differential between men and women has barely changed. Don’t underestimate how much antagonism there is toward women and how many people wish we could turn the clock back.13 Above all， be the heroine of your life， not the victim. Because you don’t have the alibi my class had—this is one of the great achievements and mixed blessings you inherit：14 Unlike us， you can’t say nobody told you there were other options. Your education is a dress rehearsal for a life that is yours to lead.
So what are you going to do？ Everything， is my guess. It will be a little messy， but embrace the mess. It will be complicated， but rejoice15 in the complications. It will not be anything like what you think it will be like， but surprises are good for you. And don’t be frightened： you can always change your mind.
And this is something else I want to tell you， one of the hundreds of things I didn’t know when I was sitting here so many years ago： you are not going to be you，fixed and immutable16 you， forever. We have a game we play when we’re waiting for tables in restaurants， where you have to write the five things that describe yourself on a piece of paper. When I was your age， I would have put： ambitious， Wellesley graduate， daughter， Democrat， single. Ten years later not one of those five things turned up17 on my list. I was： journalist， feminist18， New Yorker， divorced， funny. Today not one of those five things turns up in my list： writer， director， mother， sister， happy. Whatever those five things are for you today， they won’t make the list in 10 years—not that you still won’t be some of those things， but they won’t be the five most important things about you. Which is one of the most delicious19 things available to women， and more particularly to women than to men？ I think. It’s slightly easier for us to shift， to change our minds， to take another path. This is the life many women lead： Two paths diverge in a wood， and we get to take them both.20 It’s another of the nicest things about being women； we can do that. Did I say it was hard？ Yes， but let me say it again so that none of you can ever say the words， nobody said it was so hard. But it’s also incredibly interesting. You are so lucky to have that life as an option.
Whatever you choose， however many roads you travel， I hope that you choose not to be a lady. I hope you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there.21 And I also hope that you will choose to make some of that trouble on behalf of women. Thank you. Good luck. The first act22 of your life is over. Welcome to the best years of your lives.
1. Nora Ephron： 諾拉·艾芙隆（1941—2012），1962年毕业于威尔斯利学院，好莱坞著名导演和制片人，电影《当哈利遇上莎莉》、《西雅图夜未眠》和《电子情书》的编剧及导演，曾三次获得奥斯卡最佳原创剧本奖提名；commencement： 毕业典礼；Wellesley： Wellesley College，威尔斯利学院，又名威尔斯利女子学院，建于1875年，位于波士顿郊区，五所常春藤女校之一（Girl Ivies）。
2. president： 校长；trustee： 理事（或董事）会成员；faculty： 全体教职员。
3. Santha Rama Rau： 印度裔美籍女作家（1923—2009），擅长写游记，1944年毕业于威尔斯利，是该学院首位印度裔学生。
4. Harvard Crimson： 《哈佛深红报》，哈佛大学日报，深红色是哈佛的代名词，哈佛的建筑是深红色，哈佛的运动队也叫深红。
5. lesbianism： 女同性恋。
6. curfew： 宵禁，（要求某类人）夜晚一定时间后不准外出的规定。
7. doorknob： 门把手。
8. quota： 配额，定量。
9. fall back on： 依赖，依靠；scenario：（可能出现的）事态，局面。
10. 一次毕业后的聚会上，班里一个同学说：我们的教育所预演的生活永远无法在未来实现。dress rehearsal： 彩排。
11. valid： 有效的。
12. anchorwoman： 新闻节目女主持人；blonde： 白肤金发碧眼的女人。
13. underestimate： 低估；antagonism：敌意，对抗。
14. alibi： 托辞；inherit： 继承。
15. rejoice： 欢喜 ，感到高兴。
16. immutable： 不变的。
17. turn up： 出现。
18. feminist： 女权主义者。
19. delicious： 美妙的，令人愉悦的。
20. 两条路在林中岔开，我们都要设法去走一走。这句巧妙借用诗人罗伯特·弗罗斯特的《未选的路》里的第一句：Two roads diverged in a yellow wood， And sorry I could not travel both.
21. 我希望你们能设法打破常规，在人生的路途上制造出那么一点点小波澜。
22. act： （戏剧或歌剧的）一幕。
I remember my own graduation from Wellesley very， very well. The speaker was Santha Rama Rau3 who was a woman writer.
I want to tell you a little bit about my class， the class of 1962. When we came to Wellesley in the fall of 1958， there was an article in the Harvard Crimson4 about the women’s colleges. We were girls then， by the way， Wellesley girls. How long ago was it？ It was so long ago that while I was here， Wellesley actually threw six young women out for lesbianism5. It was so long ago that we had curfews6. It was so long ago that if you had a boy in your room， you had to leave the door open six inches， and if you closed the door you had to put a sock on the doorknob7. In my class， I don’t know， maybe 375 young women， there were six Asians and five Blacks. There was a strict quota8 on the number of Jews.
My class went to college in the era when you got a master’s degree in teaching because it was “something to fall back on” in the worst case scenario，9 the worst case scenario being that no one married you and you actually had to go to work. As one classmate said at our reunion， “Our education was a dress rehearsal for a life we never led.”10 Isn’t that the saddest line？ We weren’t meant to have futures， we were meant to marry men. We weren’t meant to have politics， or careers that mattered， or opinions， or lives； we were meant to marry men. If you wanted to be an architect， you married an architect.
My mother was a career woman， and all of us， her four daughters， grew up understanding that the question， “What do you want to be when you grow up？” was as valid11 for girls as for boys.
Why am I telling you this？ Things have changed. Things are different for you than they were for us. Just the fact that you chose to come to a single-sex college makes you smarter than we were—we came because it’s what you did in those days—and the college you are graduating from is a very different place. All sorts of things caused Wellesley to change， it did change， and today it’s a place that understands its obligations to women in today’s world. The women’s movement has made a huge difference， too， particularly for young women like you. There are women doctors and women lawyers. There are anchorwomen， although most of them are blonde.12 But at the same time， the pay differential between men and women has barely changed. Don’t underestimate how much antagonism there is toward women and how many people wish we could turn the clock back.13 Above all， be the heroine of your life， not the victim. Because you don’t have the alibi my class had—this is one of the great achievements and mixed blessings you inherit：14 Unlike us， you can’t say nobody told you there were other options. Your education is a dress rehearsal for a life that is yours to lead.
So what are you going to do？ Everything， is my guess. It will be a little messy， but embrace the mess. It will be complicated， but rejoice15 in the complications. It will not be anything like what you think it will be like， but surprises are good for you. And don’t be frightened： you can always change your mind.
And this is something else I want to tell you， one of the hundreds of things I didn’t know when I was sitting here so many years ago： you are not going to be you，fixed and immutable16 you， forever. We have a game we play when we’re waiting for tables in restaurants， where you have to write the five things that describe yourself on a piece of paper. When I was your age， I would have put： ambitious， Wellesley graduate， daughter， Democrat， single. Ten years later not one of those five things turned up17 on my list. I was： journalist， feminist18， New Yorker， divorced， funny. Today not one of those five things turns up in my list： writer， director， mother， sister， happy. Whatever those five things are for you today， they won’t make the list in 10 years—not that you still won’t be some of those things， but they won’t be the five most important things about you. Which is one of the most delicious19 things available to women， and more particularly to women than to men？ I think. It’s slightly easier for us to shift， to change our minds， to take another path. This is the life many women lead： Two paths diverge in a wood， and we get to take them both.20 It’s another of the nicest things about being women； we can do that. Did I say it was hard？ Yes， but let me say it again so that none of you can ever say the words， nobody said it was so hard. But it’s also incredibly interesting. You are so lucky to have that life as an option.
Whatever you choose， however many roads you travel， I hope that you choose not to be a lady. I hope you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there.21 And I also hope that you will choose to make some of that trouble on behalf of women. Thank you. Good luck. The first act22 of your life is over. Welcome to the best years of your lives.
1. Nora Ephron： 諾拉·艾芙隆（1941—2012），1962年毕业于威尔斯利学院，好莱坞著名导演和制片人，电影《当哈利遇上莎莉》、《西雅图夜未眠》和《电子情书》的编剧及导演，曾三次获得奥斯卡最佳原创剧本奖提名；commencement： 毕业典礼；Wellesley： Wellesley College，威尔斯利学院，又名威尔斯利女子学院，建于1875年，位于波士顿郊区，五所常春藤女校之一（Girl Ivies）。
2. president： 校长；trustee： 理事（或董事）会成员；faculty： 全体教职员。
3. Santha Rama Rau： 印度裔美籍女作家（1923—2009），擅长写游记，1944年毕业于威尔斯利，是该学院首位印度裔学生。
4. Harvard Crimson： 《哈佛深红报》，哈佛大学日报，深红色是哈佛的代名词，哈佛的建筑是深红色，哈佛的运动队也叫深红。
5. lesbianism： 女同性恋。
6. curfew： 宵禁，（要求某类人）夜晚一定时间后不准外出的规定。
7. doorknob： 门把手。
8. quota： 配额，定量。
9. fall back on： 依赖，依靠；scenario：（可能出现的）事态，局面。
10. 一次毕业后的聚会上，班里一个同学说：我们的教育所预演的生活永远无法在未来实现。dress rehearsal： 彩排。
11. valid： 有效的。
12. anchorwoman： 新闻节目女主持人；blonde： 白肤金发碧眼的女人。
13. underestimate： 低估；antagonism：敌意，对抗。
14. alibi： 托辞；inherit： 继承。
15. rejoice： 欢喜 ，感到高兴。
16. immutable： 不变的。
17. turn up： 出现。
18. feminist： 女权主义者。
19. delicious： 美妙的，令人愉悦的。
20. 两条路在林中岔开，我们都要设法去走一走。这句巧妙借用诗人罗伯特·弗罗斯特的《未选的路》里的第一句：Two roads diverged in a yellow wood， And sorry I could not travel both.
21. 我希望你们能设法打破常规，在人生的路途上制造出那么一点点小波澜。
22. act： （戏剧或歌剧的）一幕。