an old Chinese saying goes“A thousand cups of wine is not too much when best friends meet” （酒逢知己千杯少 ji^ f9ng zh～j@ qi`n b8i sh2o）， which indicates the almost essential role alcohol plays in the social life of Chinese people. Drinking in many cultures can serve to develop， one way or another， friendships. In China， however， the amount of alcohol you drink is regarded as a determiner as to how deep your friendship with your host is. The more the guest drinks， the happier the host will be. If a guest refuses to drink however， the host will feel embarrassed or will“lose face” （没面子 m9i mi3nzi） for apparently being disrespected. At a formal banquet， such as a wedding or a company’s annual dinner， the host will usually deliver a brief speech and conclude it with a“ganbei” （干杯， cheers or bottoms up） at which all guests must stand up and drink the entire contents of their glass. To show his respect to the crowd， the host will usually turn his glass upside down after he drinks as a gesture to display that it is empty. He will also usually toast guests at each table， in turn. After the host has made his rounds， guests are obliged to toast the host in return （回敬 hu！ j#ng）. Guests sitting at the same table may also toast each other （互敬 h& j#ng）. There are no fixed words for the toast but a simple rule of “serving different guests with different dishes” （看人下菜碟儿 k3n r9n xi3 c3idi9r）， or addressing different blessings to different people. For example， the host may wish an unmarried young woman an ideal husband as soon as possible （早日嫁得金龟婿 z2or# ji3 d% j～n gu`x&）； elder people， good health and longevity （长命百岁 ch1ngm3ngb2isu#）； and young people who plan to pursue studies abroad， a glorious future （前途无量 qi1nt% w%li3ng）. as to why they should. Persuading each other to drink （劝酒 qu3nji^） is common practice to show hospitality and to celebrate friendship. An early and even elegant way of quanjiu is to be found in a farewell poem by the poet Wang Wei （王维， 701-761） to his friend who was being sent to the Western border： I plead you to drink up one more cup of wine； You’ll see no more old friends beyond the Yang Pass. Qu3n j$n g-ng j#n y# b8i ji^， x～ ch$ Y1nggu`n w% g&r9n.我喝干， 你随意。This means you will not offend people whether you drink the whole thing up or if you just wet your lips. There is one exception and it is for men： if the person proposing the toast is a woman and she drinks her glass dry， it is usually polite for you to down all of your drink as well. Most quanjiu， however， are actually potential threats and require some skillful tactics to turn down. It customarily goes like this： Drink it all in one gulp if we are great friends， and just sip it if we are on nodding terms. G2nq！ng sh8n， y# k6u m8ng； g2nq！ng qi2n， ti2n y# ti2n.感情深，一口闷；感情浅，舔一舔。Both these are trapping you into the dilemma that if you don’t drink it up， you are disrespecting the one who toasts. Just as the coercive language requires both resourcefulness and cunning， the art of declining a toast politely is equally difficult to master. You may tactfully refuse by saying， 　　1. Only after the supervisors drink a toast between each other comes the subordinates’turn to propose a toast. 2. When proposing a toast， you must stand up and raise your glass with both hands. 3. It is appropriate for multiple people to propose a toast to a single person， but not the opposite. 4. If you are proposing a toast to another person， you should not drink less than that person. 5. When you are participating in a toast， remember to raise your glass lower than those of the others. 6. If there are no special guests present， toast clockwise in succession. 7. You are expected to make a blessing before proposing a toast or ganbei.
　　我是穆斯林。This one is especially effective with Han people， who pay special respect to ethnic customs of minority groups. During special occasions such as a wedding party， the bride and the groom are key target toasts. To avoid getting drunk， the couple will usually turn to the groomsman and the bridesmaid， who will drink on behalf of the couple. The unlucky couple will usually be quickly and deftly inebriated beyond their wildest imagination. Finding a buddy for “shelter” from a toast （挡酒 d2ng ji^） is not always a given， especially at workplace banquets. Fu Shanbin， a 30-year-old man who works at a domestic bank， recounts his experience at the dinner table of the bank’s annual party：“My principle is to try my best not to drink， but sometimes it fails at the insistence of the supervisor. Anyway， it is obligatory to propose a toast to the supervisor， regardless of what he says. If I am caught cheating by substituting water for baijiu， I will receive immediate punishment by drinking a full cup.”While drinking together is believed to help establish or enhance friendship， some have doubted the sincerity of friendships made at the dinner table. Such sentiments are reflected in the saying： “No drinking pals can last” （酒肉朋友难长久 ji^r7u p9ngyou n1n ch1ngji^）； or Confucius’words that：
　　If you think today’s dinner table is aggressive， then think again. The fact is Chinese people have actually grown milder than their ancestors with regards to quanjiu. According to “The Record of the Three Kingdoms” emperor of Kingdom Wei， loved to quanjiu， not with words but with sheer display of force. At a dinner for his enemy who had surrendered， he made toasts while his officer held an axe and threw nasty looks at his enemy. Naturally， nobody dared to refuse a cup. Sun Wu Kingdom， treated his guests by splashing them with cold water to keep them drinking more， ‘till you are too drunk to sit upright’. In other words， if you were alive in that era， you would never get off the hook as easily as you would today， with just a few cunning excuses.- liu jue （刘珏）