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Here are ten ways to produce more vivid (生动的), direct, concise (简洁的) composition by choosing fewer words and well organized sentences. But conciseness doesn’t mean that you write short, choppy (支离破碎的) sentences, or that you cut out (裁剪) details. It means that you simply take out (取出) empty words and phrases.
以下有十个方法用尽量少的词语和组织好的句子来写出更加生动、直接、简洁的文章。但简炼并不意味着你写短的,不连贯的句子,或者把细节裁掉,而是指取出无意义的单词和短语。
1. Use active voice使用主动的语态
Active verbs put the actor first and sound livelier than passive (被动的) verbs, which can sound static (静止的) or abstract (抽象的). Active verbs are much easier to understand and much more powerful. Try to use the active voice whenever possible.
主动动词把动作实行者放在首位,这样的句子听起来更加生动,而被动语态显得静止和抽象。主动句更容易让人理解,更富有威力。请尽可能使用主动语态。
原句:The meeting was seen by us as a ploy (策略) to delay the project. (这个会议被我们当做拖延该项目的一种策略。)
修改后:We saw the meeting as a ploy to delay the project. (我们把这个会议当成拖延该项目的一种策略。)
2. Avoid vague nouns避免使用含糊不清的名词
Phrases formed around general nouns (一般名词) such as aspect, degree, and situation clutter (使……凌乱) sentences easily. Avoid those nouns which express a vague (含糊的) concept or an abstract idea and cannot picture a specific action.
由诸如方面、程度、状态等一般名词组成的短语容易使句子变得杂乱。请避免使用这些描述模糊或抽象的概念,不能够明确说明行动的名词。
原句:She is an expert in the area of international relations. (在国际关系的领域中她是个专家。)
修改后:She is an expert in international relations. (她是国际关系方面的专家。)
3. Use words, not their definitions使用单词,而不是他们的定义
Replace explanatory (解释的) phrases with a single word that encapsulates (概括) that explanation.
用可以概括整个解释的一个词来代替解释性的短语。
原句: The crops also needed to be marketable so that families would be able to sell any yields that
exceeded (超出) what they personally required. (通过市场买卖,那些家庭才能卖掉超过个人需求的收成。)
修改后:The crops also needed to be marketable so that families would be able to sell any surplus (过剩产品). (通过市场买卖,那些家庭才能卖掉过剩产品。)
4. Avoid long noun strings避免过长的名词语串
When nouns are used to modify other nouns, readers have difficulty determining the logical relationships among the words in the string. The longer the noun string (名词语串) is, the longer it takes a reader unfamiliar with the term to figure it out (解决;弄明白). So rewrite sentences to eliminate (消除) nouns that are not needed in the noun string.
当用名词来修饰其他名词时,读者难以确定语串中词语之间的逻辑关系。名词语串越长,不熟悉这个术语的读者弄明白它所花的时间就越长。因此应改写句子,消除名词语串中不需要的名词。
原句:The lack of a secure transfer may hamper (妨碍;限制) computer security incident response efforts. (安全傳输的缺失可能会妨碍计算机安全事件响应的措施。)
以下有十个方法用尽量少的词语和组织好的句子来写出更加生动、直接、简洁的文章。但简炼并不意味着你写短的,不连贯的句子,或者把细节裁掉,而是指取出无意义的单词和短语。
1. Use active voice使用主动的语态
Active verbs put the actor first and sound livelier than passive (被动的) verbs, which can sound static (静止的) or abstract (抽象的). Active verbs are much easier to understand and much more powerful. Try to use the active voice whenever possible.
主动动词把动作实行者放在首位,这样的句子听起来更加生动,而被动语态显得静止和抽象。主动句更容易让人理解,更富有威力。请尽可能使用主动语态。
原句:The meeting was seen by us as a ploy (策略) to delay the project. (这个会议被我们当做拖延该项目的一种策略。)
修改后:We saw the meeting as a ploy to delay the project. (我们把这个会议当成拖延该项目的一种策略。)
2. Avoid vague nouns避免使用含糊不清的名词
Phrases formed around general nouns (一般名词) such as aspect, degree, and situation clutter (使……凌乱) sentences easily. Avoid those nouns which express a vague (含糊的) concept or an abstract idea and cannot picture a specific action.
由诸如方面、程度、状态等一般名词组成的短语容易使句子变得杂乱。请避免使用这些描述模糊或抽象的概念,不能够明确说明行动的名词。
原句:She is an expert in the area of international relations. (在国际关系的领域中她是个专家。)
修改后:She is an expert in international relations. (她是国际关系方面的专家。)
3. Use words, not their definitions使用单词,而不是他们的定义
Replace explanatory (解释的) phrases with a single word that encapsulates (概括) that explanation.
用可以概括整个解释的一个词来代替解释性的短语。
原句: The crops also needed to be marketable so that families would be able to sell any yields that
exceeded (超出) what they personally required. (通过市场买卖,那些家庭才能卖掉超过个人需求的收成。)
修改后:The crops also needed to be marketable so that families would be able to sell any surplus (过剩产品). (通过市场买卖,那些家庭才能卖掉过剩产品。)
4. Avoid long noun strings避免过长的名词语串
When nouns are used to modify other nouns, readers have difficulty determining the logical relationships among the words in the string. The longer the noun string (名词语串) is, the longer it takes a reader unfamiliar with the term to figure it out (解决;弄明白). So rewrite sentences to eliminate (消除) nouns that are not needed in the noun string.
当用名词来修饰其他名词时,读者难以确定语串中词语之间的逻辑关系。名词语串越长,不熟悉这个术语的读者弄明白它所花的时间就越长。因此应改写句子,消除名词语串中不需要的名词。
原句:The lack of a secure transfer may hamper (妨碍;限制) computer security incident response efforts. (安全傳输的缺失可能会妨碍计算机安全事件响应的措施。)