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Not having a best friend in high school can be tough. But there are ways to be happy, and even build quality connections to others during those years.
Steps:
1. Acknowledge that not having a best friend in high school may make you feel sad or lonely at times.
2. Don’t be hard on yourself for not having a “best friend.” Think of the things that people like about you. Write them down and remind yourself, as needed.
3. Consider the things that make you happy and do more of those activities. (Of course, if the activities are illegal or have other downsides, definitely find some positive alternatives.)
4. Identify the things you feel you miss or lack by not having a best friend and brainstorm how you can fill those “holes” in others, positive ways. For example, if you hate being alone on Saturday nights, find a regular activity to do at that time.
5. Challenge yourself by trying something new that you’ve always wanted to do—maybe it’s joining the drama club or learning how to ride a horse or taking Japanese lessons at the community college. It may sound corny, but being a “best friend” to yourself is important. Sometimes, people with a lot of “best friends” actually aren’t very happy or comfortable with themselves.
6. Be a good peer/friend to the people who are your classmates, friends or acquaintances. Having many positive connections can really add up.
7. Be open and patient. Don’t “commit” yourself to not having a close friend in high school. True friendships may take time.
Tips:
If you do want to remain open to the possibility of making a best friend, ask someone you trust if they think there are ways you could be a close friend to people. Sometimes, if we feel hopeless (or even too eager) about finding a best friend, we don’t pay attention to the things that really matter.
Warnings:
Consider that the definition of “best friend” is sometimes hyped in this country. Think about the people you know who switch best friends every few months. Dependable, consistent friends are more important than a “best friend” with whom you can share secrets for three months but then have no connections.
If not having a best friend makes you feel really bad or depressed, make sure you let your parent(s) or guardian know. It may be useful to talk additionally with a trusted adult and/or a counselor about your feelings and concerns.
Things you need:
Initiative
A sense of humor
Patience
Creativity
Possibly a raise in your allowance (to fund horseriding lessons, for example)
在高中没有一位十分要好的朋友将是非常难过的。但总有办法使你开心,甚至还可以在这段日子里与他人建立起良好的关系。
措施:
1.承认在高中没有十分要好的朋友或许有时会使你感到伤心和孤独。
2. 不要因为没有一位“密友”而感到难堪。想一想人们喜欢你的理由,把它们记下来,必要时提醒自己。
3. 思考一下使你感到开心的活动,要多参加这些活动。(当然,如果这些活动违法或有其他危害,干脆去寻找一些积极的活动。)
4. 要确定因为没有一位密友你感到自己错过或缺乏的东西,并想出你如何才能用其他积极方法来填充这些“黑洞”。例如,如果你不愿意独自一人度过周六晚上,要在那个时候去寻找一个常规活动。
5.要尝试你总是想要去做的某件新颖事情来挑战自我——或许是加入戏剧俱乐部、学会如何骑马或在社区大学中参加日语学习。也许这听起来有些过时,但成为自己的一名“密友”十分重要。有时那些拥有很多“密友”的人实际上并不开心,也不轻松。
6. 成为你的同学、朋友、熟人的好伙伴/朋友。拥有很多积极的联系确实会使你情绪昂然。
7. 要心胸开阔和耐心。不要说在高中时期不交“密友”这类硬话。良好的友谊需要时间来培养。
建议:
如果你的确想要结交一位“密友”的话,要去征询你信赖的人的意见,问他们是否想到一些你可以成为别人密友的方法。有时,如果我们对找到一位亲密朋友感到绝望(或甚至是心急火燎),我们会注意不到那些真正起作用的事情。
警告:
要考虑到“亲密”朋友的定义有时在这个国家是一种夸大宣传。想一下你认识的那些每隔几个月都会变换最亲密朋友的人。可靠、持久的朋友要比“亲密”朋友更重要,因为你只能与这样的亲密朋友分享三个月的秘密,尔后就不再联系了。
如果没有亲密朋友的确使你感到心情抑郁或沮丧,一定要让你的父母或监护人知道。另外,同一位值得信赖的成年人或顾问谈谈你的感受和顾虑或许管用。
你需要的东西:
主动
幽默感
耐心
创造性
零花钱的增加(例如去参加骑马培训课程)
Steps:
1. Acknowledge that not having a best friend in high school may make you feel sad or lonely at times.
2. Don’t be hard on yourself for not having a “best friend.” Think of the things that people like about you. Write them down and remind yourself, as needed.
3. Consider the things that make you happy and do more of those activities. (Of course, if the activities are illegal or have other downsides, definitely find some positive alternatives.)
4. Identify the things you feel you miss or lack by not having a best friend and brainstorm how you can fill those “holes” in others, positive ways. For example, if you hate being alone on Saturday nights, find a regular activity to do at that time.
5. Challenge yourself by trying something new that you’ve always wanted to do—maybe it’s joining the drama club or learning how to ride a horse or taking Japanese lessons at the community college. It may sound corny, but being a “best friend” to yourself is important. Sometimes, people with a lot of “best friends” actually aren’t very happy or comfortable with themselves.
6. Be a good peer/friend to the people who are your classmates, friends or acquaintances. Having many positive connections can really add up.
7. Be open and patient. Don’t “commit” yourself to not having a close friend in high school. True friendships may take time.
Tips:
If you do want to remain open to the possibility of making a best friend, ask someone you trust if they think there are ways you could be a close friend to people. Sometimes, if we feel hopeless (or even too eager) about finding a best friend, we don’t pay attention to the things that really matter.
Warnings:
Consider that the definition of “best friend” is sometimes hyped in this country. Think about the people you know who switch best friends every few months. Dependable, consistent friends are more important than a “best friend” with whom you can share secrets for three months but then have no connections.
If not having a best friend makes you feel really bad or depressed, make sure you let your parent(s) or guardian know. It may be useful to talk additionally with a trusted adult and/or a counselor about your feelings and concerns.
Things you need:
Initiative
A sense of humor
Patience
Creativity
Possibly a raise in your allowance (to fund horseriding lessons, for example)
在高中没有一位十分要好的朋友将是非常难过的。但总有办法使你开心,甚至还可以在这段日子里与他人建立起良好的关系。
措施:
1.承认在高中没有十分要好的朋友或许有时会使你感到伤心和孤独。
2. 不要因为没有一位“密友”而感到难堪。想一想人们喜欢你的理由,把它们记下来,必要时提醒自己。
3. 思考一下使你感到开心的活动,要多参加这些活动。(当然,如果这些活动违法或有其他危害,干脆去寻找一些积极的活动。)
4. 要确定因为没有一位密友你感到自己错过或缺乏的东西,并想出你如何才能用其他积极方法来填充这些“黑洞”。例如,如果你不愿意独自一人度过周六晚上,要在那个时候去寻找一个常规活动。
5.要尝试你总是想要去做的某件新颖事情来挑战自我——或许是加入戏剧俱乐部、学会如何骑马或在社区大学中参加日语学习。也许这听起来有些过时,但成为自己的一名“密友”十分重要。有时那些拥有很多“密友”的人实际上并不开心,也不轻松。
6. 成为你的同学、朋友、熟人的好伙伴/朋友。拥有很多积极的联系确实会使你情绪昂然。
7. 要心胸开阔和耐心。不要说在高中时期不交“密友”这类硬话。良好的友谊需要时间来培养。
建议:
如果你的确想要结交一位“密友”的话,要去征询你信赖的人的意见,问他们是否想到一些你可以成为别人密友的方法。有时,如果我们对找到一位亲密朋友感到绝望(或甚至是心急火燎),我们会注意不到那些真正起作用的事情。
警告:
要考虑到“亲密”朋友的定义有时在这个国家是一种夸大宣传。想一下你认识的那些每隔几个月都会变换最亲密朋友的人。可靠、持久的朋友要比“亲密”朋友更重要,因为你只能与这样的亲密朋友分享三个月的秘密,尔后就不再联系了。
如果没有亲密朋友的确使你感到心情抑郁或沮丧,一定要让你的父母或监护人知道。另外,同一位值得信赖的成年人或顾问谈谈你的感受和顾虑或许管用。
你需要的东西:
主动
幽默感
耐心
创造性
零花钱的增加(例如去参加骑马培训课程)