石上的影子

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  I went by the 1)Druid stone
  That 2)broods in the garden white and lone,
  And I stopped and looked at the shifting shadows
  That at some moments fall 3)thereon
  From the tree 4)hard by with a rhythmic swing,
  And they shaped in my imagining
  To the shade that a well-known head and shoulders
  Threw there when she was gardening.
  
  I thought her behind my back,
  5)Yea, her I long had learned to lack,
  And I said: “I am sure you are standing behind me,
  Though how do you get into this old track?”
  And there was no sound but the fall of a leaf
  As a sad response; and to 6)keep down grief
  I would not turn my head to discover
  That there was nothing in my belief.
  
  Yet I wanted to look and see
  That nobody stood at the back of me;
  But I thought once more: “7)Nay, I’ll not unvision
  A shape which, somehow, there may be.”
  So I went on softly from the 8)glade,
  And left her behind me throwing her shade,
  As she were indeed an 9)apparition—
  My head unturned lest my dream should fade.
  
  我漫步经过德鲁伊石,
  它呆立在花园里,白灿灿,孤孤单单。
  旁边大树的枝叶配合着韵律摇摆,
  我驻足凝视
  偶尔落在石上的婆娑树影。
  在我的遐想中,
  树影化为我熟悉的人儿
  在园中劳作时的身影。
  
  我想准是她站在我身后,
  对,是她,我痛失已久的她。
  我说道:“我知道你就站在我身后,
  可你怎么又到这熟悉的旧径上来?”
  周围寂然无语,惟有一叶飘落
  凄然作答;为抑悲伤,
  我不愿回头张望,
  怕看不到我期待的身影。
  
  背后到底有没人,
  我真想看个究竟。
  但转念一想:“不能让这影像消失,
  她或许就站在我身后。”
  于是我悄悄离开花园,
  把她的身影留在我身后。
  她确是魅影——
  我没有回头,怕梦想破灭。
  
  Thomas Hardy(1840—1928),英国著名诗人、小说家,其早期和中期的创作以小说为主,继承和发扬了维多利亚时代的文学传统,晚期则以其出色的诗歌开拓了英国20世纪文学的新局面。1891年完成的Tess of the d’Urbervilles(《德伯家的苔丝》)是其最优秀的小说,但小说发表后被指责有伤风化;而他于1896年完成的小说Jude the Obscure(《无名的裘德》)也引来了不少人的激烈攻击,这使得哈代愤而停止了小说创作,转而全力作诗。他生前一共出版了八部诗集,近千首主题多样的诗歌。
  哈代1874年和艾玛结婚,尽管婚后,他和艾玛之间出现了隔阂,但1912年艾玛的离世使他悲痛不已。他重回从前两人热恋时去过的地方,忆起往昔美好的爱情,不禁情动不已,写下了许多情感真挚的悼念诗。在这些诗里,艾玛被理想化、美化,乃至神化,俨然一个楚楚动人的完美爱人。
  The Shadow on the Stone这首诗独具匠心,描写了诗人在花园里散步到最后离开,期间怀揣的动人幻想——落在石上的婆娑树影仿若妻子平日里劳作的背影,感觉妻子就站在自己身后,却压抑着惊喜不敢回头张望,怕只是自己的一时错觉,所以宁可握紧这美好的幻想离去。这种由爱和思念引发的矛盾心理叫人心碎,也使得整个散步过程显得尤为动人且忧伤。
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