★原文从此,我不再拖拉湖北省松滋市南海中学李云峰“你”离我而去,世界朝我开出了绚丽的花。【表意不畅,缺乏诗意。】——题记坏习惯如牛皮癣般难以根除,却在一种神奇魔力面前不堪一击,遇到它,我做事拖拉的毛病荡然无存,原本暗无天日的生活变得靓丽多姿。什么能具有如此魔力?请听我细细道来。【开篇设悬,引起下文!但比喻不恰当。】 ★ Since then, I no longer drag the Songhai City, Hubei Province Nanhai High School Li Yunfeng “You ” away from me, the world opened a brilliant flower toward me. 【Bad idea, lack of poetic. 】 - Inscription bad habits such as psoriasis-like difficult to eradicate, but in front of a magical magic, encountered it, I work drag procrastination gone, the original life has become dark and beautiful scene. What can be so magical? Please listen to me carefully. 【Start opening suspended, causing the following! But the analogy is not appropriate. 】