我在少年时代的几个黄昏里遭遇了父亲向同一条河流走去,他总是因为答应借钱给某个老乡或者战友而与我母亲发生激烈的争吵。由于我的母亲并不打算拿出他所说的那笔钱,我的父亲遂准备投奔一条河流。他总是铁青着脸嗫嚅着说:我不过了,我死了算了。他向河流走去的时候,我的母亲绝望而悲凉地望着他的背影,她不再跟他争吵,并示意我跟在他身后。我在很小的时候就理解了绝望和悲凉这类词语。像是去迎接世界末日般,我远远地跟着 During my twilight years as a teenager, I encountered my father who came to the same river and always fought with my mother because he promised to borrow money from a fellow or comrade in arms. Since my mother was not going to come up with what he said, my father was ready to go to a river. He always smugly shouted: I am no more, I am dead. As he walked toward the river, my mother looked desperately and desolately at his back, and she stopped quarreling with him and showed me behind him. When I was young I understood the words despair and sadness. Like to meet the end of the world like, I am far behind