幽默小故事

来源 :中学生英语·阅读与写作 | 被引量 : 0次 | 上传用户:ullige000
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  Keep the Change
  One sweltering day, I was scooping ice cream into cones and told my four children they could “buy” a cone from me for a hug. Almost immediately, the kids lined up to make their purchases. The three youngest each gave me a quick hug, grabbed their cones and raced back outside. But when my teenage son at the end of the line finally got his turn to“buy” his ice cream, he gave me two hugs. “Keep the changes,” he said with a smile.
  不用找了
  有一天天气闷热,我将冰淇淋舀进锥筒,告诉我的四个小孩,他们可以从我这里用拥抱“购买”一筒。于是,孩子们马上排起了队来购买。较小的三个孩子每人很快的抱了我一下,抓过冰淇淋筒就跑到外面去了。最后轮到排在队尾十几岁的大儿子来“买”冰淇淋时,他拥抱了我两下,“不用找了,”他笑着说。
  Sorry, No Change Here
  A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order. There was a big sign posted. “No bills larger than $20 will be accepted.”
  The woman in front of us, pointing to the sign, remarked, “Believe me, if I had a bill larger
  than $20, I wouldn’t be eating here.”
  对不起,本店不找零钱
  我和一个朋友在快餐店排队订餐,那里很醒目地写着“不接受超过20美元的大钞(请自备零钱)”。
  我们前边的一位女士指着这个牌子对我们说:“你信不信,如果我身上有超过20美元的话,我一定不会在这儿吃饭!”
  Watching Television by Candle-light
  Teacher: Name some of Thomas Edison’s contributions to science.
  Student: If weren’t for him, we’d all be watching television by candle-light.
  点着蜡烛看电视
  老师:“列举一些托马斯·爱迪生对科学的贡献。”
  学生:“如果没有爱迪生,我们就只能点着蜡烛看电视了。”
  Which is Farther Away?
  Teacher: Which is farther away, Australia or the moon?
  Bobby: Australia.
  Teacher: Why do you say that?
  Bobby: We can see the moon, but we can’t see Australia.
  哪个更远?
  教师:“澳大利亚和月球哪个离我们更远一些?”
  博比:“澳大利亚。”
  教师:“你为什么这么说呢?”
  博比:“我们可以看见月球,却看不见澳大利亚。”
  Mother’s Day
  Boy A: Tomorrow will be Mother’s Day. I wonder what I can do to make my mother happy. Boy B: I have decided not to take my school report home tomorrow.
  母亲节
  男孩甲:“明天是母亲节。我在想能做点什么事让妈妈高兴。”
  男孩乙:“我决定明天不把我的学习成绩单带回家。”
  Doreen’s Handwriting
  Teacher: Doreen, I told you to write out this poem twenty times because your handwriting is so bad, and you’ve only written it out seventeen times.
  Doreen: My arithmetic is had as well, Miss...
  多琳的书法
  老师:多琳,我让你把这首诗抄写二十遍,因为你的字写得太糟糕了,你却只写了十七遍。
  多琳:老师,我的算术也不好……
  An Unexpected Answer
  Teacher: What do elephants have that no other animals have?
  Pupil: Little elephants.
  出乎意料的回答
  老师:什么东西只有大象才有,其它动物没有?
  学生:小象。
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