人们的择偶行为是受到个人的、社会的、文化的、经济的、地域的、制度的等多种因素制约的。文章运用社会学以及文化人类学中相关的择偶理论,通过对昆明市嵩明县滇源镇三转弯韩姓村民家庭三代人择偶观念的描述与解读,分析了当代苗族农耕社会择偶观念的变迁。尽管苗族青年男女在婚前性交往较为自由,婚姻的基础和结婚的动机在于子女、情感和经济三大因素,而这些因素在不同的时代,不同的情境中却有所不同,它们的重要性依据时代的变化而随之变迁。已婚老年夫妇在择偶过程中往往以女性是否具有生育功能为主要标准,子嗣传承成为婚姻生活中的重要内容;已婚中年夫妇在择偶过程中则更看重双方的情感因素,婚姻中个人自由的准则和爱情的主导动机得到充分体现;而已婚青年夫妇在择偶过程中受到外来文化的影响,更看重经济方面的因素。由此可看出,择偶是一种发展的过程。 People’s mate behavior is subject to a variety of factors such as personal, social, cultural, economic, geographical, and institutional constraints. By using sociology and the theory of mate selection in cultural anthropology, this article analyzes the changes of the concept of mate selection in the contemporary Miao nationality through describing and interpreting the concept of mate choice of three generations of villagers in Han county, Songyuan County, Kunming. Although Miao young men and women are more likely to have sex before marriage, the motivation for marriage and marriage lies in the three major factors of children, emotion and economy, which are different in different times and in different situations. Their importance is based on The changes of the times change with it. Married elderly couples tend to take women’s fertility as the main criterion in the course of mate selection. The inheritance of sons is an important part of marriage life. Married middle-aged couples pay more attention to the emotional factors of both parties and the freedom of marriage The guidelines and the dominant motives of love are fully reflected; and married young couples are influenced by foreign cultures in the process of mate selection, and pay more attention to economic factors. It can be seen from this, mate is a development process.