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Sent by the Chinese Government, I worked as an interpreter in South Africa for two years, starting from 2003. What impressed me most during my two-year stay there, in addition to its natural beauty, was the humor that the locals often had. Due to work relations, I was in frequent contact with some officials of 1)Thaba Chweu 2)Municipality. One day I went to the Mayor’s office and saw an interesting notice in the hall, warning the staff that the recent over-leave had caused some inconvenience for work and that the Mayor had observed this problem, written humorously, but 3)explicitly. I translated it into Chinese and would like to share with you here the humor of the South African people.
Newest Office Regulations—Thaba Chweu Municipality
Due to continuous loss of working hours during the past years, caused by the over-leave of personnel, it has become necessary to implement the following new rules and regulations.
Illness
The Municipality will accept no 4)medical certificates for absence in future. We are convinced that if you are well enough to visit the doctor in hospital, you are well enough to come to work here.
Death of Others
This is no excuse for your leave. You can do nothing more for the deceased. No time will be given off for attending funerals. However, we do suggest that funerals of your 5)next of kin be arranged during your lunch time or after hours.
Death of Your Own
Everyone has to die. Naturally the death of your own is a good excuse.However, it is expected of all to give us a two-week prior notice in order to find replacement for your post and to train the new position.
Appointment to Hospital for Operations
Appointment to hospital for operations is strictly forbidden. 6)Whilst in our service you will need everything you have—you should bring to your work everything that you had when we appointed you and should you have anything removed, we will have no alternative but to adjust your salary accordingly.
Visits to the Toilet
Far too much precious time is wasted by people spending time in the toilet. In future, visits to the toilet will be coordinated by alphabetic order. Surnames starting with “A” will be able to go between 08:30 and 08:45. Should you miss your turn, you will have to wait for the next day.
I would appreciate your kind consideration and coordination to make our working environment a more pleasant and productive one.
The Mayor
受中国政府的派遣，我自2003年起在南非从事了两年翻译工作。这两年时间里给我印象最深的事情，除了南非优美的自然风光以外，就是当地人常有的幽默风趣。由于工作关系，我经常和塔巴丘市政府的一些官员接触。一天，我去市长办公室，在大厅里看见了一份有趣的通告，警告人们最近很多人请假已给工作造成了不便且市长已经注意到这个问题。这份通告写得既幽默风趣，又清晰明了。我将它译成了中文，在此愿与你们一同分享南非人的幽默。
最新办公制度（塔巴丘市政府制定）
近年来，由于雇员请假过多，办公时间持续减少。因此，有必要实施下列新的办公规章制度。
生病
市政府今后将不接受任何医院开具的病假证明。我们确信，既然你有力气去医院看病，也就应该有力气来这里上班。
他人去世
这不是你请假的正当理由。逝者已去，你也无能为力。我们不会批假让你去参加葬礼。不过，我们建议你最好把至亲的葬礼安排在午餐时间或下班后举行。
自己去世
人必有一死，你自已去世当然是请假的好理由。不过，我们希望你能提前两周通知我们你将死去，以便我们能有充足的时间招人替你，并且对其进行岗位培训。
预约手术
因预约到医院做手术而请假，这是绝对不允许的。在我们这儿工作，你必须一应俱全——你应该一应俱全地来工作，就如当初我们聘用你时一般。万一你有“短斤缺两”的情况，我们别无它法，只能相应地调整你的工资。
上厕所
雇员上厕所浪费太多宝贵的时间了。以后上厕所将按员工的姓氏字母顺序安排，姓氏以字母“A”开头者请在八点半至八点四十五分之间上厕所。万一今天你错过了机会，就只能等到明天再去。
如你能理解并配合，为我们创造一个更加轻松而高效的工作环境，我将不甚感激。
市长
Newest Office Regulations—Thaba Chweu Municipality
Due to continuous loss of working hours during the past years, caused by the over-leave of personnel, it has become necessary to implement the following new rules and regulations.
Illness
The Municipality will accept no 4)medical certificates for absence in future. We are convinced that if you are well enough to visit the doctor in hospital, you are well enough to come to work here.
Death of Others
This is no excuse for your leave. You can do nothing more for the deceased. No time will be given off for attending funerals. However, we do suggest that funerals of your 5)next of kin be arranged during your lunch time or after hours.
Death of Your Own
Everyone has to die. Naturally the death of your own is a good excuse.However, it is expected of all to give us a two-week prior notice in order to find replacement for your post and to train the new position.
Appointment to Hospital for Operations
Appointment to hospital for operations is strictly forbidden. 6)Whilst in our service you will need everything you have—you should bring to your work everything that you had when we appointed you and should you have anything removed, we will have no alternative but to adjust your salary accordingly.
Visits to the Toilet
Far too much precious time is wasted by people spending time in the toilet. In future, visits to the toilet will be coordinated by alphabetic order. Surnames starting with “A” will be able to go between 08:30 and 08:45. Should you miss your turn, you will have to wait for the next day.
I would appreciate your kind consideration and coordination to make our working environment a more pleasant and productive one.
The Mayor
受中国政府的派遣，我自2003年起在南非从事了两年翻译工作。这两年时间里给我印象最深的事情，除了南非优美的自然风光以外，就是当地人常有的幽默风趣。由于工作关系，我经常和塔巴丘市政府的一些官员接触。一天，我去市长办公室，在大厅里看见了一份有趣的通告，警告人们最近很多人请假已给工作造成了不便且市长已经注意到这个问题。这份通告写得既幽默风趣，又清晰明了。我将它译成了中文，在此愿与你们一同分享南非人的幽默。
最新办公制度（塔巴丘市政府制定）
近年来，由于雇员请假过多，办公时间持续减少。因此，有必要实施下列新的办公规章制度。
生病
市政府今后将不接受任何医院开具的病假证明。我们确信，既然你有力气去医院看病，也就应该有力气来这里上班。
他人去世
这不是你请假的正当理由。逝者已去，你也无能为力。我们不会批假让你去参加葬礼。不过，我们建议你最好把至亲的葬礼安排在午餐时间或下班后举行。
自己去世
人必有一死，你自已去世当然是请假的好理由。不过，我们希望你能提前两周通知我们你将死去，以便我们能有充足的时间招人替你，并且对其进行岗位培训。
预约手术
因预约到医院做手术而请假，这是绝对不允许的。在我们这儿工作，你必须一应俱全——你应该一应俱全地来工作，就如当初我们聘用你时一般。万一你有“短斤缺两”的情况，我们别无它法，只能相应地调整你的工资。
上厕所
雇员上厕所浪费太多宝贵的时间了。以后上厕所将按员工的姓氏字母顺序安排，姓氏以字母“A”开头者请在八点半至八点四十五分之间上厕所。万一今天你错过了机会，就只能等到明天再去。
如你能理解并配合，为我们创造一个更加轻松而高效的工作环境，我将不甚感激。
市长