多年来,我有一种难以言说的深深挫败感,总觉得自己是一个失败的音乐家。作为音乐学院高材生的我老人家,甚至很少欣赏音乐,怕唤醒自己学无所用的痛苦。每逢看到自己那些同学们纵横驰骋在乐坛,为中国音乐事业做出很多贡献的时候,自己心态就会变得相当晦涩,像泰坦尼克号一样,迅速沉到冰冷的海底。 Over the years, I have a deep frustration that I can not speak, always feeling myself a failed musician. As a senior student at the conservatory, I often hear music very little, arousing the awakening of my pain in learning nothing. Whenever I see my classmates galloping in the music scene, make a lot of contributions to the Chinese music business, their mentality will become quite obscure, like the Titanic, quickly sink to the icy sea.