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優秀的回忆录兼备“诗”与“真”的双重因素,令人神往,发人深思。回忆录是不是伟人或者至少是名人的专属领域?对于回忆录作家来说,如何才能统辖你内心充满矛盾的多个自我?如何传达对于过去经验的当下理解?美国普利策奖和国家图书奖获奖作家特雷西·基德尔携手长期合作编辑理查德·托德,在《妙笔生花:非虚构写作的艺术》一书里,为回忆录的实践者和爱好者提供了精辟的文体剖析和写作指南。作者不是泛泛枚举回忆录的写作技巧,而是扎根于自身40年来写作和编辑非虚构作品的实践心得,同时广征博引,其间自有中国读者耳熟能详的名家名作,但更多的是对美国当代非小说类文学作品进行巡礼和审视。
Memoir beckons1. Although the form dates back at least to Saint Augustine2, it holds a particular allure for contemporary writers. Ideas about privacy and decorum3 have changed generally; even in daily life, Americans seem to expect more and more self-revelation from themselves and others. Authors who would once have felt obliged to wrap their own stories in the gauze of a roman à clef now feel entitled,4 or compelled, to speak to the reader without disguise. It feels more honest. And it can seem beguilingly5 easy, at least until one tries.
“Write about what you know,” writers are told, and it’s logical to conclude that what you know best is yourself. In fact, you may know too much. In honest moments we understand ourselves as creatures of great contrariety6. Many selves compete inside. How to honor this knowledge without descending into gibberish or qualifications worthy of a chairman of the Federal Reserve?7 How to preside over your own internal disorder? Finding the “I” that can represent the pack of you is the first challenge of them memoirists.
Postmodern wisdom has not helped, having cast the very idea of self, any self, into doubt. In his memoir, Self-Consciousness, John Updike writes: “That core ‘I’that we imagine to be so crystalline and absolute within us can also be attacked and analyzed as a construct that human society bestows.”8 Updike resists this idea, with evidence that ranges from the mundane to the spiritual:the private quirks that endure through a lifetime,9 mingled with the sense that one also has a soul. He concludes with a definition of self that is universal and undeniable: “that window on the world that we can’t bear to think of shutting.”
To place yourself on the page is in part selfdiscovery, in part self-creation. The act feels like what a lump of clay must feel like to the hands of a sculptor. This is all you have to work with, but you know there’s a face in there somewhere. You write a paragraph in the first person. You read it over. You meet—as if for the first time, though the face does look familiar—the person who speaks the words you have written. You think, That’s not me. This guy sounds downright10 mean. You pull out his fangs. Oh, no. Now he’s getting mushy11 on us. Writers want to be engaging, and it is easy to try to purchase charm at the expense of honesty, but the ultimate charm lies in getting the face more right than pretty. Memoir, fortunately, doesn’t have to take on the burden of total self-representation. It can be confined to a time, to a relationship, to a side of one’s self that doesn’t pretend to encompass the whole, to a story. Personal Memoirs of Ulysses S. Grant12 is one classic example. Grant omits many important facts of his life: his drinking bouts; the means of his extraordinary rise, from working as a clerk in a dry goods store to commanding all the Union forces; his disastrous presidency; his humiliation and bankruptcy; the fact that he was writing his book in great pain from throat cancer, knowing his death was imminent.13 But the book is cited as one of the very few presidential autobiographies that deserves to be regarded as literature, for its lucid14 and dramatic account of the author’s Civil War campaigns. One of Grant’s biographers, Edmund Wilson, pointed out that the book has the unlikely effect of keeping the reader in suspense—“actually on edge to know how the Civil War is coming out.”15
Memoirs, it’s said, were once the province of people like Grant, the great or at least the famous, for whom selfpresentation is already an accomplished fact. Now the genre has opened, opened wide to writers with no prior claim on the reader’s imagination. The current abundance of new and recent memoirs can feel overbearing, and even alarming, a symptom of spreading self-absorption.16 But if the democratization of the form has helped to create that oversupply, it has also produced some distinguished books. Often they tell the sorts of stories that Grant didn’t tell, stories that on the surface, anyway, don’t reflect kindly on themselves.
Confession as a means of reconstructing the self can have a keyhole-like fascination for the reader. Perhaps every memoir should reveal something the author doesn’t reveal in daily life. But confession carries various risks. A sly vanity can lurk in a recitation of misdeeds, a reveling in one’s colorfulness:17 Oh, what a bad girl I was! Or one can end up presenting a much too limited concept of the self. Some, though not all, recent stories of addiction fall into this trap and leave the reader thinking,“There’s more to everyone than the love of vodka.”
How the writer conveys present knowledge of past experience is a delicate problem for all memoirists. The question of how much to reveal in constructing a self on the page merges into the fundamental question of how much to interpret and how much simply to describe. When to comment on the past, when simply to portray it in all its starkness18 and let it speak for itself? It can be tempting to disown19 the past only to celebrate the present self. What a fool I was! (But how clever I am now to see it.) And all the while the reader knows that previous selves are not so easily discarded. Self-exploration, including confession, almost always involves other people. Some of them are bound to be offended by an honest memoir. But the good and honest memoir is neither revenge nor selfjustification, neither selfcelebration nor self-abnegation20. It is a record of learning. Memoirs, by definition, look backward. They are one response to Kierkegaard’s21 dilemma that life can only be understood backward but must be lived forward. Memoirs survey a past with the benefit of the knowledge that experience has yielded. With The Education of Henry Adams 22, Henry Adams created the perfect title. Every memoir worth reading could be called The Education of the Author. The “I” has been somewhere and it now knows something that it didn’t, and that is a thing of value for writer and reader alike.
Here are some basic rules of good behavior for the memoirist:
Say difficult things. Including difficult facts.
Be harder on yourself than you are on others. The Golden Rule23 isn’t much use in memoir. Inevitably you will not portray others just as they would like to be portrayed. But you can at least remember that the game is rigged24: only you are playing voluntarily.
Try to accept the fact that you are, in company with everyone else, in part a comic figure.
Stick to the facts.
回忆录令人心驰神往。尽管这种文体至少可以回溯到圣奥古斯丁时期,却对当代作家格外具有诱惑力。关于隐私和体统的观念已经普遍发生了变化;即使是在日常生活里,美国人似乎也期望自己和他人能够越来越多地表露自我的本来面目。曾经感到有义务把自己的故事乔装成一篇影射小说的作者,现在感到自己可以不带伪装地跟读者说话,不但有权利这么做,而且还非得这么做不可。这么做感觉更诚实。这么做看似容易,至少在下笔尝试以前看来是这样,其实不然。
“你了解什么,就写什么,”作家被如是告诫,合乎逻辑的结论就是你最了解的莫过于你自己。实际上,你可能自我了解得太深了。在诚实的时刻,我们把自己理解为充满矛盾性的生物。多个自我在内心互相竞争。怎么样才能尊重这点认识,而不至于让自己堕落到胡说八道,或者瞎诌的资质和美联储主席旗鼓相当?怎么样才能统辖你本人内心的杂乱无序?找到可以代表你这个集合体的第一人称叙事者“我”,是回忆录作家面临的第一挑战。
后现代式的智慧质疑自我的观念本身,包括任何形式的自我,因此对作者没什么帮助。在回忆录《自我意识》里,约翰·厄普代克写道:“那个被我们想象成在我们内心深处透明而纯粹的核心‘自我’也可能受到攻击,被解析为人类社会所赋予的一种构造物。”厄普代克抗拒这种观念,他的证据跨越了从世俗到精神的广阔领域:既有持续一生的个人怪癖,也混杂着自我也拥有灵魂的意识。在结尾,他把无所不在而又无可争辩的自我定义为“那扇世界之窗,将它关上的想法让我们无法忍受。”
把你自己写进作品,部分是自我发现,部分是自我创造。这一行为,感觉犹如一位雕塑家手里捧著一团黏土。你必须用于创作的素材全都在这儿了,可是你知道在这堆材料里的不知道什么地方有着一张面孔。你用第一人称写了一段。你把这段读了一遍。你和那个说着你笔下话语的人物相遇,仿佛是有生以来第一次,虽说那张面孔看起来的确很熟悉。你想,这可不是我。听起来这家伙刻薄至极。你拔掉他的毒牙。啊呀,不好。这会儿他又在我们面前表现得感情脆弱。作家们无不希望自己的作品引人入胜,很容易为了吸引读者而牺牲诚信,可是作品的终极吸引力却在于恰如其分地描摹这张面孔,而不是一味美化它。
幸运的是,回忆录不必承受全面表现自我的负担。可以把它局限于一段时间,一段关系,不必自命涵括整体的自我的一个侧面,或者一个故事。《尤利西斯·S. 格兰特个人回忆录》就是一个经典范例。格兰特省略了自己一生当中的很多重要事实:他的多次纵饮;他如何神奇地崛起,从纺织品商店店员成为南北战争中的北军统帅;他灾难性的总统任期;他的耻辱和破产;他在写这本书的时候,正处于喉癌的极大痛苦当中,知道自己大限将近。可是这本书却被誉为寥寥无几的称得上有文学价值的总统自传之一,因为它清晰而富有戏剧性地记述了作者经历的南北战争中历次战役。格兰特的传记作者之一埃德蒙·威尔逊指出,这本书出人意料地始终让读者处于悬念当中,“居然焦灼不安地渴望知道,南北战争究竟会出现什么结果。” 据说,回忆录一度是格兰特之类伟人或者至少是名人的专属领地,对他们来说,自我表现已经是既成事实。如今,这个体裁已经对公众开放,对于以前无权调动读者想象力的作家们,大门是洞开的。时下新鲜出炉的回忆录层出不穷,可能会让人觉得盛气凌人,甚至令人惊恐不安,这正是自恋癖广为传播的一种症候。可是,这种文体的民主化一方面造成了它的过度供给,另一方面也催生了一些杰出的著作。它们经常讲述格兰特没有讲述过的故事类型,这类故事至少在表面上对自我的表现并不友善。
自白作为一种重构自我的手法,可能对读者产生了一种类似从锁眼里偷窥他人的诱惑力。也许每一篇回忆录都应该泄露作者在日常生活中没有泄露的某些秘事。可是自白有多重风险。详述自己的不端行为可能狡黠地隐含了某种自负,对自身多姿多彩性的洋洋自得:啊呀,我是个不折不扣的坏女孩!或者到头来,人们表现出来的自我观念可能过于狭隘。近来一些(尽管不是所有)有关不良嗜好的故事就掉进了这种陷阱,让读者不禁想:“除了个个都贪恋杯中物以外,这些人总该有点儿别的什么出奇之处吧?”
对于所有的回忆录作家来说,如何传达对于过去经验的当下理解,是一个需要审慎处理的问题。在文字里创造一个自我时应该泄露多少的问题,融入了阐释和纯粹描写应该各占多少比例的根本性问题。什么时候应该对过去作出评论,什么时候只需按照原样如实描绘,让过去自我展现?仅仅是为了颂扬当下的自我就声明与过去脱离关系,可能对作者很有诱惑力。我那时真是个不折不扣的傻瓜!(可是现在我看穿了这一点,多聪明啊!)可是自始至终读者都知道,以前的各个自我并不是说抛开就能抛开的。
自我探索,包括自白,几乎总是涉及其他人物。这些人物有的必然会被一部说实话的回忆录激怒。可是优秀而诚实的回忆录既不是报仇雪耻,也不是自我辩护,既不是自我颂扬,也不是自我克制。它是学习历程的记录。顾名思义,回忆录回顾以往。它们是对克尔凯郭尔式两难困境“生活必须朝前走,可是理解生活必须朝后看”的一种回应。回忆录审视一段过往岁月,经验产生的知识给它带来了优势。《亨利·亚当斯的教育》是亨利·亚当斯给自己的回忆录拟定的完美标题。每一部值得阅读的回忆录都可以被称为《作者的教育》。 这个“我”已经去过了某个地方,现在懂得了以前不懂的一些东西,这一点对于作者和读者同样富有价值。
以下是回忆录作家应遵守的一些良好品行的基本规则:
写难写的东西。包括难写的事实。
对自己比对他人更加严厉。“推己及人”的黄金定律并不怎么适用于回忆录。无可避免地,你不会按照他人的意愿来刻画他们的形象。可是你至少可以记住,这是一场受到操纵的游戏:只有你在自愿地玩它。
努力接受這一事实:你和任何其他人一样,在一定程度上是个喜剧人物。
忠于事实。
1. beckon: 诱人,有吸引力。
2. Saint Augustine: 圣·奥古斯丁(354—430),古罗马基督教神学家,他的《忏悔录》被称为西方历史上第一部 “自传”。
3. decorum: // 有礼,得体。
4. gauze: 纱布,薄纱;roman à clef: novel with a key的法语表达,指影射真人实事的小说。
5. beguilingly: // 有欺骗性地。
6. contrariety: // 矛盾性。
7. gibberish: 胡言乱语;the Federal Reserve: 美国联邦储蓄系统(The Federal Reserve System),简称美联储,负责履行美国中央银行的职责。
8. John Updike: 约翰·厄普代克(1932—2009),20世纪美国最伟大的小说家之一,两度获得普利策小说奖;crystalline: 清澈透明的,水晶般的;bestow: // 给予,赋予。
9. mundane: // 世俗的;quirk:怪癖,古怪的性格。
10. downright: 完全地,彻底地(强调令人不快或负面的品质或行为)。
11. mushy: 感伤的,感情脆弱的。
12. Ulysses S. Grant: 尤利西斯·S. 格兰特(1822—1885),美国南北战争北军总司令、第18任美国总统(1869—1877),其暮年出版的回忆录受到公众、军事历史学家和文学批评家一致赞赏。
13. drinking bout: 纵饮,狂饮酒会;dry goods store: 在美国,dry goods store销售纺织品、成衣等商品,在零售业区别于hardware store(五金店)和grocery store(食品店);Union force: 美国南北战争时期的联邦军(北军);imminent: 即将发生的,临近的。
14. lucid: 易懂的,表达清楚的。
15. Edmund Wilson: 埃德蒙·威尔逊(1895—1972),美国文学批评家和社会批评家,下面的引文出自其著作《爱国者之血:美国内战文学研究》(1962);on edge: 紧张不安的,急切的。
16. overbearing: 傲慢的,专横的;self-absorption: 自恋,一心只想着自己。
17. lurk: 暗藏,潜伏;revel in...: 陶醉于……,以……为乐。
18. starkness: 简易,朴素。
19. disown: (因感到羞耻等而)与……脱离关系。
20. abnegation: 克己,放弃。
21. Kierkegaard: 索伦·克尔凯郭尔(1813—1855),丹麦哲学家,存在主义哲学之父。
22. Henry Adams: 亨利·亚当斯(1838—1918),美国历史学家,两代亚当斯总统的后裔,回忆录获1919年普利策奖(传记类)。
23. the Golden Rule: 指“人应具有同理心”的黄金法则,积极面为“推己及人”,消极面为“己所不欲,勿施于人”。
24. rig:(以不正当手段)操纵,控制。
Memoir beckons1. Although the form dates back at least to Saint Augustine2, it holds a particular allure for contemporary writers. Ideas about privacy and decorum3 have changed generally; even in daily life, Americans seem to expect more and more self-revelation from themselves and others. Authors who would once have felt obliged to wrap their own stories in the gauze of a roman à clef now feel entitled,4 or compelled, to speak to the reader without disguise. It feels more honest. And it can seem beguilingly5 easy, at least until one tries.
“Write about what you know,” writers are told, and it’s logical to conclude that what you know best is yourself. In fact, you may know too much. In honest moments we understand ourselves as creatures of great contrariety6. Many selves compete inside. How to honor this knowledge without descending into gibberish or qualifications worthy of a chairman of the Federal Reserve?7 How to preside over your own internal disorder? Finding the “I” that can represent the pack of you is the first challenge of them memoirists.
Postmodern wisdom has not helped, having cast the very idea of self, any self, into doubt. In his memoir, Self-Consciousness, John Updike writes: “That core ‘I’that we imagine to be so crystalline and absolute within us can also be attacked and analyzed as a construct that human society bestows.”8 Updike resists this idea, with evidence that ranges from the mundane to the spiritual:the private quirks that endure through a lifetime,9 mingled with the sense that one also has a soul. He concludes with a definition of self that is universal and undeniable: “that window on the world that we can’t bear to think of shutting.”
To place yourself on the page is in part selfdiscovery, in part self-creation. The act feels like what a lump of clay must feel like to the hands of a sculptor. This is all you have to work with, but you know there’s a face in there somewhere. You write a paragraph in the first person. You read it over. You meet—as if for the first time, though the face does look familiar—the person who speaks the words you have written. You think, That’s not me. This guy sounds downright10 mean. You pull out his fangs. Oh, no. Now he’s getting mushy11 on us. Writers want to be engaging, and it is easy to try to purchase charm at the expense of honesty, but the ultimate charm lies in getting the face more right than pretty. Memoir, fortunately, doesn’t have to take on the burden of total self-representation. It can be confined to a time, to a relationship, to a side of one’s self that doesn’t pretend to encompass the whole, to a story. Personal Memoirs of Ulysses S. Grant12 is one classic example. Grant omits many important facts of his life: his drinking bouts; the means of his extraordinary rise, from working as a clerk in a dry goods store to commanding all the Union forces; his disastrous presidency; his humiliation and bankruptcy; the fact that he was writing his book in great pain from throat cancer, knowing his death was imminent.13 But the book is cited as one of the very few presidential autobiographies that deserves to be regarded as literature, for its lucid14 and dramatic account of the author’s Civil War campaigns. One of Grant’s biographers, Edmund Wilson, pointed out that the book has the unlikely effect of keeping the reader in suspense—“actually on edge to know how the Civil War is coming out.”15
Memoirs, it’s said, were once the province of people like Grant, the great or at least the famous, for whom selfpresentation is already an accomplished fact. Now the genre has opened, opened wide to writers with no prior claim on the reader’s imagination. The current abundance of new and recent memoirs can feel overbearing, and even alarming, a symptom of spreading self-absorption.16 But if the democratization of the form has helped to create that oversupply, it has also produced some distinguished books. Often they tell the sorts of stories that Grant didn’t tell, stories that on the surface, anyway, don’t reflect kindly on themselves.
Confession as a means of reconstructing the self can have a keyhole-like fascination for the reader. Perhaps every memoir should reveal something the author doesn’t reveal in daily life. But confession carries various risks. A sly vanity can lurk in a recitation of misdeeds, a reveling in one’s colorfulness:17 Oh, what a bad girl I was! Or one can end up presenting a much too limited concept of the self. Some, though not all, recent stories of addiction fall into this trap and leave the reader thinking,“There’s more to everyone than the love of vodka.”
How the writer conveys present knowledge of past experience is a delicate problem for all memoirists. The question of how much to reveal in constructing a self on the page merges into the fundamental question of how much to interpret and how much simply to describe. When to comment on the past, when simply to portray it in all its starkness18 and let it speak for itself? It can be tempting to disown19 the past only to celebrate the present self. What a fool I was! (But how clever I am now to see it.) And all the while the reader knows that previous selves are not so easily discarded. Self-exploration, including confession, almost always involves other people. Some of them are bound to be offended by an honest memoir. But the good and honest memoir is neither revenge nor selfjustification, neither selfcelebration nor self-abnegation20. It is a record of learning. Memoirs, by definition, look backward. They are one response to Kierkegaard’s21 dilemma that life can only be understood backward but must be lived forward. Memoirs survey a past with the benefit of the knowledge that experience has yielded. With The Education of Henry Adams 22, Henry Adams created the perfect title. Every memoir worth reading could be called The Education of the Author. The “I” has been somewhere and it now knows something that it didn’t, and that is a thing of value for writer and reader alike.
Here are some basic rules of good behavior for the memoirist:
Say difficult things. Including difficult facts.
Be harder on yourself than you are on others. The Golden Rule23 isn’t much use in memoir. Inevitably you will not portray others just as they would like to be portrayed. But you can at least remember that the game is rigged24: only you are playing voluntarily.
Try to accept the fact that you are, in company with everyone else, in part a comic figure.
Stick to the facts.
回忆录令人心驰神往。尽管这种文体至少可以回溯到圣奥古斯丁时期,却对当代作家格外具有诱惑力。关于隐私和体统的观念已经普遍发生了变化;即使是在日常生活里,美国人似乎也期望自己和他人能够越来越多地表露自我的本来面目。曾经感到有义务把自己的故事乔装成一篇影射小说的作者,现在感到自己可以不带伪装地跟读者说话,不但有权利这么做,而且还非得这么做不可。这么做感觉更诚实。这么做看似容易,至少在下笔尝试以前看来是这样,其实不然。
“你了解什么,就写什么,”作家被如是告诫,合乎逻辑的结论就是你最了解的莫过于你自己。实际上,你可能自我了解得太深了。在诚实的时刻,我们把自己理解为充满矛盾性的生物。多个自我在内心互相竞争。怎么样才能尊重这点认识,而不至于让自己堕落到胡说八道,或者瞎诌的资质和美联储主席旗鼓相当?怎么样才能统辖你本人内心的杂乱无序?找到可以代表你这个集合体的第一人称叙事者“我”,是回忆录作家面临的第一挑战。
后现代式的智慧质疑自我的观念本身,包括任何形式的自我,因此对作者没什么帮助。在回忆录《自我意识》里,约翰·厄普代克写道:“那个被我们想象成在我们内心深处透明而纯粹的核心‘自我’也可能受到攻击,被解析为人类社会所赋予的一种构造物。”厄普代克抗拒这种观念,他的证据跨越了从世俗到精神的广阔领域:既有持续一生的个人怪癖,也混杂着自我也拥有灵魂的意识。在结尾,他把无所不在而又无可争辩的自我定义为“那扇世界之窗,将它关上的想法让我们无法忍受。”
把你自己写进作品,部分是自我发现,部分是自我创造。这一行为,感觉犹如一位雕塑家手里捧著一团黏土。你必须用于创作的素材全都在这儿了,可是你知道在这堆材料里的不知道什么地方有着一张面孔。你用第一人称写了一段。你把这段读了一遍。你和那个说着你笔下话语的人物相遇,仿佛是有生以来第一次,虽说那张面孔看起来的确很熟悉。你想,这可不是我。听起来这家伙刻薄至极。你拔掉他的毒牙。啊呀,不好。这会儿他又在我们面前表现得感情脆弱。作家们无不希望自己的作品引人入胜,很容易为了吸引读者而牺牲诚信,可是作品的终极吸引力却在于恰如其分地描摹这张面孔,而不是一味美化它。
幸运的是,回忆录不必承受全面表现自我的负担。可以把它局限于一段时间,一段关系,不必自命涵括整体的自我的一个侧面,或者一个故事。《尤利西斯·S. 格兰特个人回忆录》就是一个经典范例。格兰特省略了自己一生当中的很多重要事实:他的多次纵饮;他如何神奇地崛起,从纺织品商店店员成为南北战争中的北军统帅;他灾难性的总统任期;他的耻辱和破产;他在写这本书的时候,正处于喉癌的极大痛苦当中,知道自己大限将近。可是这本书却被誉为寥寥无几的称得上有文学价值的总统自传之一,因为它清晰而富有戏剧性地记述了作者经历的南北战争中历次战役。格兰特的传记作者之一埃德蒙·威尔逊指出,这本书出人意料地始终让读者处于悬念当中,“居然焦灼不安地渴望知道,南北战争究竟会出现什么结果。” 据说,回忆录一度是格兰特之类伟人或者至少是名人的专属领地,对他们来说,自我表现已经是既成事实。如今,这个体裁已经对公众开放,对于以前无权调动读者想象力的作家们,大门是洞开的。时下新鲜出炉的回忆录层出不穷,可能会让人觉得盛气凌人,甚至令人惊恐不安,这正是自恋癖广为传播的一种症候。可是,这种文体的民主化一方面造成了它的过度供给,另一方面也催生了一些杰出的著作。它们经常讲述格兰特没有讲述过的故事类型,这类故事至少在表面上对自我的表现并不友善。
自白作为一种重构自我的手法,可能对读者产生了一种类似从锁眼里偷窥他人的诱惑力。也许每一篇回忆录都应该泄露作者在日常生活中没有泄露的某些秘事。可是自白有多重风险。详述自己的不端行为可能狡黠地隐含了某种自负,对自身多姿多彩性的洋洋自得:啊呀,我是个不折不扣的坏女孩!或者到头来,人们表现出来的自我观念可能过于狭隘。近来一些(尽管不是所有)有关不良嗜好的故事就掉进了这种陷阱,让读者不禁想:“除了个个都贪恋杯中物以外,这些人总该有点儿别的什么出奇之处吧?”
对于所有的回忆录作家来说,如何传达对于过去经验的当下理解,是一个需要审慎处理的问题。在文字里创造一个自我时应该泄露多少的问题,融入了阐释和纯粹描写应该各占多少比例的根本性问题。什么时候应该对过去作出评论,什么时候只需按照原样如实描绘,让过去自我展现?仅仅是为了颂扬当下的自我就声明与过去脱离关系,可能对作者很有诱惑力。我那时真是个不折不扣的傻瓜!(可是现在我看穿了这一点,多聪明啊!)可是自始至终读者都知道,以前的各个自我并不是说抛开就能抛开的。
自我探索,包括自白,几乎总是涉及其他人物。这些人物有的必然会被一部说实话的回忆录激怒。可是优秀而诚实的回忆录既不是报仇雪耻,也不是自我辩护,既不是自我颂扬,也不是自我克制。它是学习历程的记录。顾名思义,回忆录回顾以往。它们是对克尔凯郭尔式两难困境“生活必须朝前走,可是理解生活必须朝后看”的一种回应。回忆录审视一段过往岁月,经验产生的知识给它带来了优势。《亨利·亚当斯的教育》是亨利·亚当斯给自己的回忆录拟定的完美标题。每一部值得阅读的回忆录都可以被称为《作者的教育》。 这个“我”已经去过了某个地方,现在懂得了以前不懂的一些东西,这一点对于作者和读者同样富有价值。
以下是回忆录作家应遵守的一些良好品行的基本规则:
写难写的东西。包括难写的事实。
对自己比对他人更加严厉。“推己及人”的黄金定律并不怎么适用于回忆录。无可避免地,你不会按照他人的意愿来刻画他们的形象。可是你至少可以记住,这是一场受到操纵的游戏:只有你在自愿地玩它。
努力接受這一事实:你和任何其他人一样,在一定程度上是个喜剧人物。
忠于事实。
1. beckon: 诱人,有吸引力。
2. Saint Augustine: 圣·奥古斯丁(354—430),古罗马基督教神学家,他的《忏悔录》被称为西方历史上第一部 “自传”。
3. decorum: // 有礼,得体。
4. gauze: 纱布,薄纱;roman à clef: novel with a key的法语表达,指影射真人实事的小说。
5. beguilingly: // 有欺骗性地。
6. contrariety: // 矛盾性。
7. gibberish: 胡言乱语;the Federal Reserve: 美国联邦储蓄系统(The Federal Reserve System),简称美联储,负责履行美国中央银行的职责。
8. John Updike: 约翰·厄普代克(1932—2009),20世纪美国最伟大的小说家之一,两度获得普利策小说奖;crystalline: 清澈透明的,水晶般的;bestow: // 给予,赋予。
9. mundane: // 世俗的;quirk:怪癖,古怪的性格。
10. downright: 完全地,彻底地(强调令人不快或负面的品质或行为)。
11. mushy: 感伤的,感情脆弱的。
12. Ulysses S. Grant: 尤利西斯·S. 格兰特(1822—1885),美国南北战争北军总司令、第18任美国总统(1869—1877),其暮年出版的回忆录受到公众、军事历史学家和文学批评家一致赞赏。
13. drinking bout: 纵饮,狂饮酒会;dry goods store: 在美国,dry goods store销售纺织品、成衣等商品,在零售业区别于hardware store(五金店)和grocery store(食品店);Union force: 美国南北战争时期的联邦军(北军);imminent: 即将发生的,临近的。
14. lucid: 易懂的,表达清楚的。
15. Edmund Wilson: 埃德蒙·威尔逊(1895—1972),美国文学批评家和社会批评家,下面的引文出自其著作《爱国者之血:美国内战文学研究》(1962);on edge: 紧张不安的,急切的。
16. overbearing: 傲慢的,专横的;self-absorption: 自恋,一心只想着自己。
17. lurk: 暗藏,潜伏;revel in...: 陶醉于……,以……为乐。
18. starkness: 简易,朴素。
19. disown: (因感到羞耻等而)与……脱离关系。
20. abnegation: 克己,放弃。
21. Kierkegaard: 索伦·克尔凯郭尔(1813—1855),丹麦哲学家,存在主义哲学之父。
22. Henry Adams: 亨利·亚当斯(1838—1918),美国历史学家,两代亚当斯总统的后裔,回忆录获1919年普利策奖(传记类)。
23. the Golden Rule: 指“人应具有同理心”的黄金法则,积极面为“推己及人”,消极面为“己所不欲,勿施于人”。
24. rig:(以不正当手段)操纵,控制。