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今天的父母大都接受这样一个理念:孩子是需要赞赏的。也常常听到有人说:“好孩子是夸出来的。”在我们的周围,更是能听到家长对孩子毫不吝啬的夸奖“儿子,你真棒!,”“孩子,你太聪明了!”“你真是好样的!”……也许我们并不觉得这有什么不好,鼓励孩子,让他们更自信,更努力,似乎无可厚非。但是,赞赏其实是把双刃剑,如果运用不好,它的结果往往会违背我们的初衷。赞赏有时候会变成对孩子的评价和论断,不恰当的赞赏可能会出现意想不到的后果:
Most of today’s parents accept the idea that children need praise. Also often heard someone say: “good children are boasted. ” Around us, but also to hear the parents do not mean praise for their children “son, you are awesome! ” “Children You’re so smart! ”“ You’re so kind! ”" Maybe we do not think this is a bad thing. Encouraging children to make them more confident and work harder seems beyond reproach. However, appreciation is actually a double-edged sword. If the application is not good, its result often runs counter to our original intention. Appreciation can sometimes become a child’s assessment and assertion, inappropriate appreciation may have unexpected consequences: