美与丑的对话

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  史莱克2
  
  史莱克的故事大家一定很熟悉吧。那个一反传统童话般爱情的故事把我们搞懵了、逗乐了。原来还有这么丑、却又这么可爱的男女主角!
  依然记得李银河在谈起与王小波的爱情时说:“我起初怀疑,一对不美的人的恋爱是美的吗?后来的事实证明,两颗相爱的心在一起可以是美的。”
  
  丑的展示:连自己的父亲都不能够接受女儿丑陋却真实的外表,更别说其他人了。
  25)Herald: Announcing the long-awaited return of the beautiful Princess Fiona and her new husband.
  Fiona: Well, this is it.
  King: This is it.
  Crowd: This is it. This is it.
  (The crowd is dumbfounded at the sight of Shrek and Fiona, crowd quiets, baby cries.)
  Shrek: So, you still think this is a good idea?
  Fiona: Of course, look, Mom and Dad look happy to see us.
  King: Who on earth are they?
  Queen: I think that’s our little girl.
  King: That’s not little, that’s a really big problem. Wasn’t she supposed to kiss Prince Charming and break the 26)spell?
  Queen: Well, he’s no Prince Charming, but they do look…
  Shrek: Happy now? We came. We saw them. Now let’s go before they light the 27)torches.
  Fiona: They’re my parents.
  Shrek: Hello, they locked you in a tower.
  Fiona: Hey, that was for my own…
  King: Good! Now, here’s our chance. Let’s go back inside and pretend we’re not home.
  Queen: Harold, we have to be…
  Shrek: Quick, while they’re not looking we can make a run for it.
  Fiona: Shrek! Shrek! Stop it! Everything is gonna be…
  King: A disaster. There’s no way…
  Fiona: You can do this.
  Shrek: But I really...
  King: Really…
  Queen: Really…
  Fiona: Don’t…
  Queen: Want…
  Shrek: To…
  Queen: Be…
  King: Here.
  Fiona: Mom, Dad. I’d like you to meet my husband, Shrek.
  
  通报官:现在宣布,我们期待已久的美丽的菲奥纳公主和她的新婚驸马回来了。
  菲奥纳:好了,这一刻终于来临了。
  国王:这一刻终于来临了。
  人群:这一刻终于来临了。这一刻终于来临了。
  (人们被史莱克和菲奥纳的样子吓呆了,人群安静下来,婴儿吓哭了。)
  史莱克:瞧,你还是觉得到这里来是个好主意?
  菲奥纳:当然了,你看,母后和父王看见我们多高兴。
  国王:他们究竟是什么人啊?
  皇后:我想应该是我们的小可爱女儿吧。
  国王:那也叫小可爱?那是个大问题才对。她不是应该跟白马王子亲吻后解除咒语的吗?
  皇后:啊,他可不是什么白马王子,但他们确实看上去……
  史莱克:现在高兴了?我们来了,也看见他们了,趁他们没有点亮火把之前赶快溜之大吉吧。
  菲奥纳:他们可是我的父母啊!
  史莱克:拜托,他们把你锁在塔里面哦。
  菲奥纳:那也是为了我自己……
  国王:好了!我们现在还有机会。赶快躲进里面假装不在家吧。
  皇后:哈罗德,我们必须得……
  史莱克:赶快!趁他们还没有看清楚,我们赶快溜之大吉吧。
  菲奥纳:史莱克!史莱克!别这样!一切将会是……
  国王:一场灾难。毫无办法了……
  菲奥纳:你可以做到的。
  史莱克:但我真的……
  国王:真的……
  皇后:真的……
  菲奥纳:不……
  皇后:想……
  史莱克:去……
  皇后:到……
  国王:这里……
  菲奥纳:妈妈,爸爸,我想让你们认识一下我的丈夫,史莱克。
  丑的遭遇:那些缠绵悱恻、荡气回肠的爱情故事,好像都属于俊男美女,没有丑人的份儿。但那是真实的生活吗?
  
  Shrek: Excuse me. Sorry to barge in like this, but…
  Fairy Godmother: What in 28)Grimm’s name are you doing here?
  Shrek: Well, it seems that Fiona’s not exactly happy.
  Fairy Godmother: Hoo Hoo. Is there some question as to why that is? Well, let’s explore that, shall we? Ah. P, P, P, P, P. Princess. 29)Cinderella. Here we are, “lived happily ever after.” Oh, no 30)ogres! Let’s see, Snow White. “A handsome prince.” Oh, no ogres! Sleeping Beauty. Oh, no ogres. Hansel and Gretel, no. Thumbalina, no. The Golden Bird. The Little Mermaid. Pretty Woman... No. No. No. No. No. You see, ogres don’t live happily ever after.
  Shrek: All right. Look, lady…
  Fairy Godmother: Don’t you point those dirty green sausages at me.
  
  史莱克:不好意思,抱歉我这样子闯进来,但是……
  神仙教母:看在格林的份上,你来这里干什么?
  史莱克:呃,菲奥纳看起来一点不开心。
  神仙教母:喔,喔。那是不是事出有因呢?好吧,那我们就来探究一下,好吗?啊,公,公,公,公,公。公主篇。《灰姑娘》,找到了,“从此过着幸福快乐的日子。”哦,没有妖怪!我们再看看,《白雪公主》,“英俊的王子。”哦,没有妖怪!《睡美人》,哦,没有妖怪。《汉赛尔与格雷特》,没有。《拇指姑娘》,没有。《黄金鸟》、《小美人鱼》、《漂亮姑娘》,没有,没有,没有,没有,没有。你看看,妖怪不会从此过着幸福快乐的日子的。
  史莱克:好了。听着,女士……
  神仙教母:不要用你肮脏的绿香肠一样的手指指着我。
  
  丑的美丽:史莱克和菲奥纳喝了神仙教母的药,变得漂亮了。只要在那一刻菲奥纳亲吻史莱克就可以保住这样的躯壳。但是最后菲奥纳还是选择了接受真实。
  
  Shrek: Fiona. Is this what you want? To be this way, forever?
  Fiona: What?
  Shrek: ’Cause if you kiss me now, we can stay like this.
  Fiona: You’d do that? For me?
  Shrek: Yes.
  Fiona: I want what any princess wants, to live happily ever after. With the ogre I married.
  
  史莱克:菲奥纳,这是你想要的吗?保持这个样子,永远?
  菲奥纳:什么?
  史莱克:因为只要你现在吻我,我们就能保持现在的样子了。
  菲奥纳:你愿意这样做?为了我?
  史莱克:是的。
  菲奥纳:我想要每一位公主都想要的,从此幸福快乐地生活,和我所嫁的妖怪在一起。
  


  

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