在我母亲的两幅肖像前

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  I love the beautiful young girl of this
  portrait, my mother, painted years ago
  when her forehead was white, and there was no
  shadow in the dazzling 1)Venetian glass
  of her gaze. But this other likeness shows
  the deep trenches across her forehead’s white
  marble. The rose poem of her youth that
  her marriage sang is far behind. Here is
  my sadness: I compare these portraits, one
  of a joy-radiant brow, the other care-
  heavy: sunrise—and the thick coming on
  of night. And yet how strange my ways appear,
  for when I look at these faded lips my heart
  smiles, but at the smiling girl my tears start.
  
  我深爱着多年前的这幅肖像里
  那年轻貌美的姑娘,她是我的母亲
  那时,她前额皎白,她那闪耀着七彩光芒的眼睛
  没有一丝黯然。但她的另一幅肖像则显出
  那一道道深深的纹路爬过她白皙
  如大理石的前额。她年少时那首玫瑰诗篇
  曾被她的婚姻所吟唱,而今已远去。我的悲伤
  就在于:我对比两幅肖像,一幅
  神情愉悦,另一幅忧心
  忡忡:一幅宛如旭日初升——另一幅则如夜里重重黑暗
  来袭。然而我的看法多么奇怪,
  当我看着那失去光泽的双唇时,我的心
  在微笑,但面对那含笑如花的少女时,我却潸然泪下。
  
  对这首英文小诗的喜爱使得我一等再等——等待CR5月号的来临,等待在康乃馨散发出浓郁的母爱气息的节日里为大家奉上。请原谅,尽管多番查阅,却始终无法查证这首诗是否出自一贯用法语写作的加拿大诗人Emile Nelligan(艾米里·奈利根,1879—1941)之手,抑或是经人英译。但可以确定的是,这一英文版的小诗令许多读过它的人感慨良多,我自然也不例外,因为我一直都有着和诗人同样沉重的心情。我也曾端详过母亲少女时代的那张黑白照片,照片上的她扎着两条小麻花辫,一副无忧无虑的模样,清纯可人。我喜欢听母亲讲述她年轻时的一个个小故事,还执意要和她一块走走她年少时爬过的山路。前些年,看到乌发中乍现银丝的她曾经手足无措。我知道多少安慰的话都是徒劳,在人生的每个阶段里,我们总要克服各种情绪。让人开心的是,每当母亲买到喜欢的衣服,就会迫不及待地穿上并在镜子前欢欣雀跃。每每看到她这种“小女孩”的举动,我的心里总会萌生一丝安慰——正因为见证了她容颜的老去,她那历经风霜的面容于我才如此亲切而熟悉。而那张将她美好的青春年华定格下来的黑白照片却总会令我心痛——我爱我的母亲,这爱超越了我对生活的热爱。愿天下所有历经岁月历练、曾经拥有灿烂青春年华的母亲们都能从容坦然地面对岁月流失、容颜老去,都能永远持有一颗年轻的心!
  
  1) Venetian glass 威尼斯彩色装饰玻璃,原产于威尼斯及附近地方的一种精致玻璃
  
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